me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
There was so much jailbait at the festival that there was no other option but to drink my morals away
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
how goes living off caffiene and alcohol?
i may have recently shit my pants. on two separate occasions.
Randomize