I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Just facebooked the guy whose name you're yelling in there. So you're aware, his interests include "swearing at babies" and "Ice luge"
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
Nothing quite says Coachella like me doing high yoga in the middle of a field by myself
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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