Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Tis the season to puke in grandma's bathroom
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I knew my sister shouldn't have gone to the bacherlotte party. Two of the other brides maids have black eyes and my fiancé called me and asked if this is the crazy she's marrying
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I just made a dick pic collage. Let me just tell you,there is no comparison to the latest!
If you're gonna show up unannounced on hangover day, you better have coffee doughnuts and a boner
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
