I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
So im using the back of a keystone box as notecard for my presentation
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
You better fuck one or both of those bitches and bring me pictures that will make me uncomfortable
I can do at least one of those things.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
You called my nipples compassionate. What does that even mean?
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
He literally ejaculated and I hit Uber
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
I know you want to take a pregnancy test, but could you wait until Sunday so it doesn't ruin our weekend
Randomize
