U know u have sex too much when u have lube in ur rolliball on ur blackberry
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
my shower just felt like jesus cried on me. like he shed tears just for my shower.
My lab manual has instructions for making home wine. Room project?
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
i'm exhausted. do you know how hard it is to put together an outfit that is professional enough to secure a babysitting job yet slutty enough to let him know i'm down for sex during naptime?
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Just got a 15 minute lecture from a drag queen about how bisexuality doesn't exist. Cher would be so disappointed in her.
Went to take a shower. Brought my wine, forgot my towel.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
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