I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
It was awesome explaining why I had a tiger with boxers in my bed, a little bit drunk, to a girl in a pre-sex moment
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
He just sent me the contact information about getting the Zebra for graduation...
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
You answered, dry heaved into the phone twice, & then hung up on me.
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
Was picked up in the middle of a bar full of people...apparently I'm not tall enough to reach for drunken makeouts. I'm proud of myself.
Randomize
