I wish scraping a resin bowl could be considered cleaning.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
The girl that works the front desk at my gym invited me and my friend to come see her Tuesday during her shift at hooters because its her birthday. I still have a boner
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
Randomize
