arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
Talk about awkward... Just went to dinner with my mother and realized I fucked our waiter the night before. She HAD to see the looks he was giving me!
I feel the need to send all my exes pictures of penises larger than theirs. Because they all must suffer.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
We were fucking and his phone rang and it was his grandma. He just had a conversation with his grandma while fucking me from behind. Then his dad called and asked him what he wanted from taco bell.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
you made it your goal to puke in every planter around the union. you got most of them. im proud of you
Is it disrespectful or patriotic to pole dance on an american flag pole?
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
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