like what am i supposed to say "im thinking of how bad that sex was"?
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
I'm watching ellen!
just because im gay does not mean you need to notify me every time you watch the ellen degeneres show
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
my coworker just texted me asking if i remember pissing in the mop bucket at the gas station
I should show up to the gym drunk more often. I felt like i really motivated all the fat people.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
