I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped.
Princesses don't give blow jobs
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
His concept of male bonding is doing lines in adjacent stalls.
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Drunk me needs to be reminded of my sexual preferences.
at least it wasnt animals
I deserve like a purple heart or something. I just made it all the way drunk through my 2 story house without making a sound. While carrying a trombone.
We tried to hook you up with a girl but you said you'd rather fuck the large muscular black man because "At least he'd be tight". He was the bouncer, he heard you.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
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