come home now. i got a twizzler tangled in my hair again
the 24 hour champagne diet aint going so well
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I have realized now that neither the top nor bottom of a bunk bed is safe for sex....
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I will fight anything that is not spinning right now
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
I fell asleep while eating jimmy johns last night and then woke up at 5am and continued to eat it
You know it's bad when I'm eating a cold chicken breast alone in bed 😕
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
I remember being like "I can't hold both of you guy's hair back!" so I put headbands on each of you
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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