When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
You've got more to offer than just money. Come on. You have an awesome rack.
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
She started calling me daddy on the second date and I don't know how to react to that
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
Randomize
