Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
so my aunt is sitting on the couch, eating a brownie and watching the biggest loser saying how it's not that hard to eat healthy
man i love america
Just saw a guy wearing pink jeans and i bet he's straight. Fuck 2009.
he left me a 6 minute video of him peeling a clementine listening to justin bieber
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I think I should receive an honorary Heisman... I mean, I did sleep with two of the finalists
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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