Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
My mom just said "okay girls, the ONLY thing i ask is that you stay sober Saturday afternoon, until halfway through lunch. And you don't wear that crystal camo hat. This is a funeral, not a tailgate party"
Best wishes.
Who the abstract fuck do you think you are!?
he's single and there are thong briefs.
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