haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
But that background check said 51...Omg. If I hooked up with someone that's my dads age.....
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
go for it girl, the world is ur dick oyster
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
So this is what bad decisions tastes like...
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Considering I drank for you last night, do you mind picking up your half of the hangover
Randomize
