The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE. I WILL STOP HOOKING UP WITH GUYS EX'S FOR REVENGE.
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Great, now even dream!me is a drunken borderline mess.
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
She said cowgirls can can pee standing up and proceeded to pull up her dress and drop her underwear.
Randomize
