You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
We could sell used underwear with pictures of us wearing them.
found: crazy homeless guy quoting Quagmire lines to every chick he sees. i think i win the scavenger hunt.
Buying beer for freshmen. No matter what they ask for, I'm getting them Colt 45.
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
Hey. Hope youre not too hungover. Also, did you put a Christmas tree in my guest bathroom and cover it with condoms?
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
FOund a bunch of old fireworks spring cleaning.
Who is our new insurance provider?
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
A Morman just tried to recruit me and I told him "Trust me, you don't want me"
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
I must stop trying to make out with my friends when I'm hammered.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
Randomize
