If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
around noonish you got carried out for spitting water and throwing cups at old people...
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
Fuck you. You would only tell me how to get to your house in Spanish.
that's like... drinking popov and saying its the worlds best vodka. you gotta try some others first. THERE SHOULD BE A MISS AMERICA PAGEANT. but like, mr penis. and they can do tricks and make unintelligent remarks and wear sparkly condoms.
They left at like 4. I got up to help clean their house this morning and we found his pants. No ones heard from him, we're all a little scared.
I brought him flowers on my way home from cheating on him. Boyfriend of the year award right here.
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
If there aren't any tits where you are, you're doing it wrong.
I need a beard to bite.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
i woke up with blood and cuts on my face and i don't remember anything after winning four games of beer pong in a row last night. and i'm still drunk.
you are a true champion. bear my children.
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
Randomize
