i just realized that no matter how many potstickers i eat, i will never be asian
You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Just found a hole in my wall with your left shoe in it.
Apparently she doesn't appreciate the significance of eskimo sisterhood as much as I do.
Is everything ok? Last time I missed your call you were being arrested.
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Stop giving guys blow jobs because you're no good and it's messing up my sex life. Word gets around & then they think it's me and don't believe me when I say I have a twin. Learn to stuck dick right.
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
