I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
Pretty sure I just shit out pure stomach acid. I'll explain after you take me to a hospital
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Intramural soccer game tonight. Be ready for blood. I haven't sobered up since thursday
i've created a new STD.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
there was so much lube in my brother's closet...
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Somebody put William Shatner singing Bohemian Rhapsody on the jukebox, and the whole bar is about to riot.
Randomize
