He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
i forgot to tell you that olivia sent me a text yesterday that the mormon girl got caught with weed in her vagina at school
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
Sweet. I'm actually coaching my work study into a 4-girl orgy so dinner was kinda important. Yes, I'm the best boss ever.
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
Are you considering all the consequences of doing your boss or are you just rationalizing with your vagina?
You said dick pics aren't attractive
Random ones, from strangers, no. But a beautiful penis I know and love, absolutely :3
Oh! You were the one walking around cradling the bottle of Fireball all night!
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
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