More tranny stories later!
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
the laptop wouldn't balance on his lap. that's how well endowed he is.
I scrubbed the bathroom, smoked a bowl, and gave myself 3 orgasms. If the world ends today, I feel accomplished.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I thought my broken hand would put a damper on Halloween, but fake costume eyelashes and hydrocodone are kinda fun at the same time.
Sitting in bed reading a porn novel off my phone and accidentally just made Siri start reading the most graphic part aloud. FUN FIRST NIGHT WITH THE NEW ROOMIE.
hopefully I won't be diving through a thorn bush to escape an explosion this time
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