i just rode the bull and i see vomit in my future.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
so just incase I die tonight I'm making a list of people that I don't want to be let in to my funeral
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
on a related note, did you know that the fire alarm in our apartment talks?
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I went commando last night, then accidentally flashed a police van...They acknowledged it.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
And the cockring thing wasn't sexual.
I was living a snoop dogg song I fucked her on the floor so I wouldn't mess up my bed
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
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