Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
Yeah i knew he wasn't okay when he told me he was "seeing his vision"
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
and than he said 'I did amateur porn for a while' and I just knew tinder did not fail me this time
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Randomize
