The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
I went out in a blaze of glory. I failed the field sobriety test by saying ABCD FUCK YOU.
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
The guy who's car I hit last night just followed me on Twitter...not sure how to feel about it.
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
When my card got declined you bought the vibrator without me even asking. This is what friendship is.
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