I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
He said that if more girls show up hes not going to ask ages... Spoken like a true sex offender
She soaked the fruit in vodka for ten minutes and then mixed it with normal fruit and sherbert icecream. It was called "lottery fruit".
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
WHAT IF I SAT OUTSIDE AND STARTED SCREAMING THE LYRICS TO O CANADA WOULD THAT FIX IT
PLEASE DON'T
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
Randomize
