I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
This is what my life has come to. Drinking champagne alone yelling at the dog because no one wants to hang out with me
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
It's like the drive of shame on fucking Christmas. Happy birthday Jesus
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
Randomize
