what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Yep we found him face down in my sister's bathroom begging for blowjobs without mustard
the boys lacrosse roster just went up... now we can see who we had sex with
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
He said I took his samurai sword off his wall and proceeded to jump off his porch at people coming home from the bar.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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