Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
In retrospect, getting to second base BEFORE anal wouldve been a good idea
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
She thinks I come over for the sex, but I really come for the snacks.
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
Random thought: what if being devoured by animals was a death penalty option...and you got to choose the animal?
You know we have no secrets, right? I mean, you saw me shitting in a gift bag drunk and naked on Christmas eve.
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I fucked him while wearing his hat. I love the navy
Randomize
