i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
my bed looks and feels like i need to buy plan b.
I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Do I go to spinning class and try to redeem myself from going drunk, or do I wait a week and hope they forget I fell of the bike?
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
I have beer and butt plugs...pretty sure I will find a way to entertain myself while I wait
Randomize
