He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
After we did it I noticed she was wearing the same underwear as last night.
That's why you don't sleep with the same girl two nights in a row man!
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
After giving the pizza guy directions you told him to look for the big stupid looking kid outside in purple
Long labias. Talking about. Too drunk to explain. Tomorrow.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
You barfed off the front porch while the elderly neighbors were walking their dog. We had to convince them not to call 911.
Pics or it didn't happen.
ever feel bored AND lazy?
I call it "awake" but yeah...
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
