lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
That's a really weird place to spoon. Especially if there are more accessible places to spoon. Like a bathtub.
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
She refused to give me a hand job while we were watching a war movie saying she didn't wanna disrespect the soldiers
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
if you just come over, i will entertain you
arguing about the color of your bong does not count as entertainment
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
One guy got his nose broke and was playing with it. Then another guy was playing beer pong off his horse.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
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