my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
My wrist bandage is guacamole stained. What an accurate representation of my life as a whole
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
He just told me that he goes squirrel hunting. NO LONGER BANGABLE.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
Randomize
