Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
Ummmm I went to see who was upstairs, he was the only one in his room so we had sex while the travel channel played in the background.
Oh good. Romantic. Still, I'm jealous of the sex.
Probably not, since he made me promise not to tell anyone it only lasted ten seconds.
I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
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