Also, the republican called me again last night. He called me dumb and ugly then begged to come over. Gosh... he knows how to make me want him...
How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
Come help me clean. I know we won't be getting our security deposit back...but I would like to move out with our dignity.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Last time we had a party like that I woke up naked on the pool table with a chalk outline around me and a empty bottle of jager duct taped to my hand.
Yea. I'm excited about this party too
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
i was talking to them for like 5 mins and they were like HEY LETS GET A PICTURE and tequila said it was good idea
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
He wouldn't stop calling me so I sent him a text saying "I'm dead. Dead. Leave me alone." And he replied with "so can I see you then?"
I was supposed to go on a date tonight but I cancelled because I found out the Lizzie McGuire movie is on Netflix.
Randomize