Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
You know whats sad? As I walk past the campus daycare i cant help think, look at those drunk mistakes
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
how is it that I keep meeting up with you when Im drunk?
you stand on my porch screaming my name until I come out with you...
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Because that's what you do with poop. You expect the worst.
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
