At a strip club after monster truck rally. You should be here
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
We'll probably be arrested for having a cheetah in our apartment anyway, so I say go for it.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize