There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
farters have to be the big spoon...
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
I have no idea what to do about this. He has a power over me and I think its called his tongue.
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.
That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
Randomize
