One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
her moans were so awkward that i kept asking "what" when she'd say my name...
I guess I just laid down next to him with the entire pot of mac n cheese and started giving him a handie with one hand and eating with the other
Yeah he got kind of mad when he found out he had chased his last two shots with a combination of orange soda, water, and used mouth wash.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I'll just save you what dignity you have left by letting what happened die with your lack of memory and/or liver.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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