just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
Ohh man. That was a snatch-waxer with a score to settle.
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
The blow job award ceremony was a little much. You guys didn't need to call out what happened the night before.
What? How can you say that? You won!
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
NO. NONE OF THAT. SHAME ON YOU.
Success! We fucked roommates!
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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