I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
Im not moving so it's going to have to be a 3 some.
You fuck like a mechanic. That is the universe telling you that is your true calling. Take this as a sign.
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
For future reference, Twizzlers CAN leave welts.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
well he got me up crazy early but i got pizza for breakfast and an electric blanket to sleep with sooo he passed the one night stand test.
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
Just found an airplane bottle of whiskey and I didn't put it in my coffee. I think I deserve a little recognition this morning.
Dude just walked up to me, gave me his number and said, if this number ever calls its my penis,better keep that one handy. I cant lie its the best pick up line ever, im calling his penis.
Randomize
