think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
everyone has their kryptonite. mine just happens to be 18 year old blonde girls.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Ok cuz s'mores night just turned into pina colada after noon and it will be mas fun
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
He added me on LinkedIn while I was baking weed brownies in the boxers he left here... Is this adulthood?
I totally just pulled my thong out of my purse at the grocery store. Oops.
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
