If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
I just scored a new eye doctor and a date all in one email. BOOM!
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
They said you went back in for 30 minutes and were walking with your arms out like an eagle soaring
I've been with my family a total of 20 minutes and I'm ready to go on a bender. This is going to be a long weekend.
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
So apparently I tried texting you last night to tell you I wasn't coming home, but all I had typed were lyrics from Evita
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
