Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
I pulled an all nighter. So hoped up on coffee and aderall. Pretty sure you could take my pulse through a snow jacket...
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
I love birth control. How's that for a Facebook status on valentines day.
I woke up at like 4 am with an old Korean woman cuddling me. I assure you she was not there when I went to sleep.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
He stopped in the middle of us fucking so he could turn on lithuanian techno music. And the sad thing is that it was the best sex of my life.
i just realized i have only had sex on couches so far this year. i can't decide if that's impressive or trashy
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