I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Dude apparently i ran into the middle of a half marathon last night and some how won
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
her bf's celebrating 10 yrs of service at kfc...it's safe to say all the good men are taken
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
I could seriously attempt to try and saw my head in half with a butter knife cause im pretty sure it could not hurt any more than it already does
Just so you know, this text is a buffer between the two guys I'm sexting. Can't get that shit messed up.
Woke up backwards on a recliner
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
And by not handle it I mean it makes me want to sit on his face
she just kept straddling the railing to the stairs and shouting "come on Seabiscuit, lets win this for America."
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
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