At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
Everyone is hammered wasted already...young, old, the dying, babies...we got them all
I am so 35 right now. Listening to REM, drinking red wine, and crying over an article about ecstasy in oprah magazine.
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
All I know is she had me sitting on the kitchen floor with her little Pomeranian eating potato chips And shredded cheese. I don't even know dude. I don't even know.
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
Hahaha wear something that says i'm here to party but wont go farther then a handjob.
I'm starting to think my role in the world is to inject batshit crazy, mentally unbalanced chicks with a dose of normal sperm.
I take to many stalker pics of him. If he ever looks through my phone he'll never give me sex again :(
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
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