I want to get so wasted that I make middle aged irish men look like mormon girls
You were waisted for 48 hours and the only 3 words you said were yup, sure, and michigan
He just did blow off my nipples. He's not serious about his girlfriend.
After New Year's Eve I will be hibernating my life away. Only wake me up for skiing, schnapps, and sex. In that order.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
She said "oh yeah" like Hulk Hogan with the muscle flex and everything. Totally digging this chick
okay have fun. but Under NO circumstances ever attempt to outdrink the german exchange student. no matter how badly you want to blow him. just don't.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
I know you won't see this for awhile, but I had to tell somebody, and you're like the only person who won't judge me for having an accidental erotic encounter with General Tso's chicken.
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize