its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
If i ever start ordering tequila again please tackle me to the ground and steal my wallet
I need a gatorade, my back cracked, my crimper, my shot glass, a sock of rice and an explanation.
You did this to yourself.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
YOU WILL GIVE ME MASHED POTATOES OR I WILL RIP YOUR SOUL INTO 7 PIECES AND YOU WILL TURN INTO LORD VOLDEMORT
I was just at the gas station and happened to look left and see a girl blowing some guy. How was your night?
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
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