He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
So hungover. Sitting in class about to puke during this ladys flute performance. Not sure why were having a flute concert in biology
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
Dude. This guy has a ketchup bottle full of jello shots. Best. Thing. Ever.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
Have a glass of wine with dinner they said. Your hydrocodone has worn off they said... NOPE
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
Shit on my own feet while puking from my hangover. Is this what 33 is supposed to be like?
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
How am I supposed to buy weed and pancake mix when it's raining?
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
