i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
wooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo
ooooooooooooo i'm drink
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
bleeding from the face, sitting in a shopping cart and holding a wad of ripped caution tape. what else would i be doing?
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
And then he posed under the bed and said, "you should draw me like one of your french girls." Why do they keep giving this kid drugs?
We need more drag queens in our life I've decided
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
He hasn't texted me back since last week when we sexted. I think telling him I wanted to choke him with chains was a bit much for our first time.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Randomize
