if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
you're the one who masterbates every night to the titanic soundtrack
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
i feel like i shouldn't just had to send a text that said "no i will not eat your ass"
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Congrats, you are the first person our bartender ever met that actually needed wheeled out of a bar in a wheelchair. He said you were his hero.
Randomize
